There is a significant difference between responding and reacting. One we have to learn.
Responding and reacting are two separate actions that can greatly influence our relationships and overall mental, emotional and physical health.
Responding involves taking the time to consider a situation, gathering information, and then choosing the best course of action based on that information and considering your own personal values, morals, principles, and beliefs. It requires thoughtful reflection and the ability to weigh the consequences of your actions.
Responding allows for a more intentional and thoughtful approach to handling any given situation, rather than reacting impulsively. By responding instead of reacting, we can often make more informed decisions and act in a way that aligns with our values and goals. Leaving the situation with self-confidence and pride, knowing that what was said, done, or what behaviors were exhibited were in your own best interest. this does require thoughtfulness and self-awareness.
Some react when I point this out as time consuming and "hard" well if you believe that it wastes time and will be hard, it will be, how's reacting to life from a place of fear and anger working for you?
Relationships of any kind will not and can't thrive from a place of fear, anger or any negative emotion.
On the other hand, reacting is often done impulsively, without much consideration for the consequences. It's when those intrusive thoughts take over. It can be driven by emotions such as anger, fear, or frustration, leading to potentially harmful outcomes. This is often a result of a life time of hurts, no doubt, but you are not your past, you are not the people that hurt you and you're better than that, wallowing in the past hurts does nothing but create more pain and suffering for you. You're not a victim, so don't behave like one.
Learning to respond rather than react is a skill that can greatly benefit us in our personal and professional lives. It allows us to approach situations with a level head, consider different perspectives, and make decisions that are in line with our values and goals.
By getting clear on our own personal values, morals, principles, and beliefs we can get super clear on how we want to live our lives and make decisions that align with who we truly are. This self-awareness allows us to navigate through life with authenticity and confidence, knowing that we are staying true to ourselves.
The old blue print, wiring and operating system can be a thing of the past, will the thoughts of wanting to react and yell ever go away? They most certainly will become less and less obvious over time, know that what ever conditioning and programming has been done over the years, maybe decades will fade, go away fully? Not likely.
That's where daily intentional practice is imperative, and having supportive people in your life, such as someone like me, a coach, can help you navigate through your unique journey.